I had to take my dog to the vet yesterday because he had been limping pretty bad. So far it is looking like arthritis is getting the best of him. They did some blood work and also needed a urine sample. After waiting quite a while in the exam room they come back with my dog while holding one of those kidney shaped throw up bowls from the hospital. They asked me if I could walk him out front to see if that would make him more comfortable and they could get a urine sample. Of course, I was more than happy to hold my dog’s leash while he urinated on someone else’s hand.
Alas, no luck. Rhino refused to to oblige.
So, with a smile the vet collected our life savings and told us we would need to collect the sample and they proceeded to hand me a sample cup that was just a little smaller than a pill bottle. I laughed and asked if they were serious. I’m supposed to catch the urine stream of a 105 pound german shepard with a cup no bigger than a pill bottle. The vet politely told me she would suggest using a bowl or some other container to catch it and then transfer it.
Great! So now I have an ailing dog I had to spend my life savings to find out had arthritis and now I had to destroy dishes to collect urine from him. Destroy dishes you may ask? Yes. Destroy dishes. Dish to be more precise. White plastic mixing bowl to be even more precise. Why destroy it. Easy. Because I am married. I, personally, would simply rinse the bowl and toss it in the dishwasher, but being married there was no way that bowl was even coming close to coming back inside the house. It touched dog urine. It’s not safe to use anymore.
Even after I explained to my wife that we have three children and I’m sure there is nothing in our possession that hasn’t touched urine or feces she wouldn’t have it. So I did what any self-respecting father would do in this situation.
I made my son use the bowl to collect urine and I let him put it in the sink so I could watch the upcoming fireworks when my wife discovered the urine bowl had been placed in our kitchen sink.
Sorry for the horrible image. I was in a hurry and didn’t want to open the door and disturb the process so I had to take the picture behind a screened window.
Let me just say that being a father has its rewards!